What Was My Part?
How Did Each Person Involved Show Up In an Interaction?
Take a look at an event that that has occurred in a relationship in your life in which you did not get what you wanted. Take a look at how you did what you did in the transaction.
- What was the stimulus (the situation) that created the transaction? Describe what happened that created the transaction.
- Who were the participants involved?
- What was the purpose of the transaction?
- What was the need?
- Who had the need? – I/Self/Me, You, We
- Who identified and defined the need?
- Was the need identified and defined by one person or by all involved?
- Was this a need or an expectation to get a specific outcome?
- Who created the transaction?
- What was my part in creating the transaction?
- Did others involved participate in creating the transaction?
- Were all involved included from the beginning to the end of the transaction?
- What was the solution?
- What was my part in forming and defining the solution to fill the need?
- What was the other person’s part in forming and defining the solution to fill the need?
- Were all involved included in identifying and defining the solution to fill the need?
- Describe the actions were taken?
- What action did I take?
- What action did others involved take?
- Was each person involved in the transaction included or excluded from the beginning to the end of the transaction?
- What were the consequences?
- Was your need met?
- Were the needs of others met?
- How was the presence of each person valued?
- Were the needs of each person valued equally?
- Was someone valued more than another – put on a pedestal?
- Was someone valued less than another -discounted?
- How did each person involved feel about the outcome?
- Were you satisfied with the outcome?
- Were the others involved satisfied with the outcome?
- Were most or all involved satisfied with the outcome?